“To love somebody without knowing how to love wounds the person we love…”
Buddhist monk Thich Nhat Hanh commented on love — “To love somebody without knowing how to love wounds the person we love”. His meditation on love will strike a chord with most of us, for in trying to love we often find ourselves hurt and hurting the one we love. Intellect takes over wisdom. Frivolities such as — why didn’t you take my call? Why is that picture still on Instagram? — become deciding factors in the equation of love, despite well being aware that the person loves but doesn’t know how to. ‘How to love’, then becomes the foundation to a relationship that people begin being sure of its eternal nature.
Nhat Hanh further elaborates — “To know how to love someone, we have to understand them.” If ‘understanding’ is essential, communication is what facilitates a clear understanding of the expectation from the one we love or want to. Often in colossal efforts of trying to display love, we could cause the person to feel rejected. To a brink of them feeling estranged.
Or at times, we change ourselves hoping we could find acceptance from the one we love. However, we forget that the fundamental nature of the universe is to not reverse or force an outcome, but to flow. And if it is meant to be, it will be. To put it in poet and philosopher Khalil Gibran’s words, “Think not you can direct the course of love, for love, if it finds you worthy, directs your course.”
Back to what is needed for a flourishing relationship, as the reverent monk says, “To understand, we need to listen.” And to listen, we must communicate.
Romance Reboot is being held for all those who are soon to find a second chance at love — post a separation, divorce, or having widowed.
When: March 20, 8 pm.
Where: Sacred Earth Cafe, Kavuri Hills, Hyderabad